Thirteen authors who are also experts in the area of sex addiction, have joined together to write “Mending a Shattered Heart – A guide for Partners of Sex Addicts”. Each has written with a clarity that is not only educational but also inspirational for those who are caught in an extremely difficult situation involving sex addiction.
The book is divided into two sections. The first is for partners of sex addicts and the second for specific situations.
Beginning with a chapter that defines sex addiction, the book goes on to discuss the importance of an appropriate disclosure by the addict that will reduce pain and hopefully lead to the building of trust and honesty in the future.
Partners of sex addicts usually have more questions than answers and the authors address several included whether the situation will improve, how to decide about staying in the relationship or leaving it. They also address sexuality for the partner, staying safe, setting boundaries and making sure that self-care is practiced.
One chapter outlines the strengths that can be found through a twelve-step program.
In the second part of the book, which deals with specific situations, family issues such as how to share information with the couple’s children are addressed. One whole chapter is focused on situations where the addict is attracted to minor children. Issues involving Infidelity and sex addiction in gay couples is included as is the topic “Is My Partner Gay?”
The last two chapters of the book deal with leaving the relationship and with staying in the relationship. Each of them offers strategies that will help the individuals to make healthy choices.
“The Twelve Steps of Sex Addicts Anonymous”, a Resource Guide of organizations and fellowships that support those in recovery as well as a seven-page Recommended Reading list can be found at the end of the book.
The authors who contributed to “Mending a Shattered Heart” offer honest, helpful strategies that are valuable for both sex addiction partners and therapists.. Stephanie Carnes has done and excellent job of editing the book.
Finding out that someone who you love has been secretly involved in activities can be very traumatic and confusing. This book provides not only support but also wisdom for those who are not sure what to do or how to recover. The information is clear and the advice is filled with wisdom.
I highly recommend this book for those who are struggling and those who are wanting to help them.
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